How to annoy people
•Buy a large quantity of orange traffic cones and reroute whole
•Adjust the tint on your tv so that all the people are green,
•Sing the Batman theme incessantly.
•Staple papers in the middle of the page.
•Ask 800 operators for dates.
•Produce a rental video consisting entirely of dire FBI copy warnings.
•Sew anti-theft detector strips into people's backpacks.
•Write in pen the surprise ending to a novel on its first page.
•Specify that your drive-through order is "to go".
•Learn Morse code, and have conversations with friends in
•Order a side of pork rinds with your filet mignon.
•Leave your Nine Inch Nails tape in Great Uncle Ed's
•Publicly investigate just how slowly you can make a "croaking" noise.
•Honk and wave to strangers.
•Tape pieces of "Sweating to the Oldies" over
climactic parts of
•Decline to be seated at a restaurant, and simply eat
•dont use any punctuation either
•Pay for your dinner with pennies.
•Tie jingle bells to all your clothes.
•Repeat everything someone says, as a question.
•Write "X - BURIED TREASURE" in random spots on all of
•Inform everyone you meet of your personal Kennedy
•Repeat the following conversation a dozen times: "Do you
•Light road flares on a birthday cake.
•Wander around the restaurant, asking other diners for their parsley.
•Leave tips in Bolivian currency.
•Demand that everyone address you as "Conquistador".
•Push all the flat Lego pieces together really tightly.
•At the Laundromat, use one dryer for each of your socks.
------- ~*Intermission*~ -------
•Wear a cape that says "Magnificent One".
•Stand over someone's shoulder, mumbling, as they read.
•Finish the 99 bottles of beer song.
•Leave your turn signal on for fifty miles.
•Inform others that they exist only in your imagination.
•Ask people what gender they are.
•Lick the filling out of all the Oreos, and place the cookie
•Forget the punch line to a long joke, but assure the listener
•Routinely handcuff yourself to furniture, informing the curious
•Sculpt your hedges into anatomically suggestive shapes.
•Follow a few paces behind someone, spraying everything they
•Deliberately hum songs that will remain lodged in co-workers'
•While making presentations, occasionally bob your head like
•Lie obviously about trivial things such as the time of day.
•Make beeping noises when a large person backs up.
•Change your name to John Aaaaasmith for the great glory of
•Sit in your front yard pointing a hair dryer at passing cars to
•Chew on pens that you've borrowed.
•Invent nonsense computer jargon in conversations, and see if
•Ask to"interface" with someone.
•Sing along at the opera.
•At a golf tournament, chant "swing-batatatatatata-suhWING-batter!"
•Finish all your sentences with the words "in accordance
•Ask the waitress for an extra seat for your "imaginary friend".
•Go to a poetry recital and ask why each poem doesn't rhyme.
•Ask your co-workers mysterious questions, and scribble their
•Incessantly recite annoying phrases, such as "sticky
•Stare at static on the TV and claim you can see a "magic eye picture".
•Select the same song on the jukebox fifty times.
•Scuff your feet on a dry, shaggy carpet and seek out victims.
•Do not add any inflection to the end of your sentences,
•Signal that a conversation is over by clamping your hands over
•Construct your own pretend "tricorder", and
"scan" people with it,
•Holler random numbers while someone is counting.
•Make appointments for the 31st of September.
•Invite lots of people to other people's parties.
•Last but not least send everybody you can to this webpage!!!
If you want to keep sending this on here's a few ways how!!! : )
1. Make sure this page is up.
Have your contact list available. Highlight the person's name that you
want to receive this page by left clicking on their name.
Return to Jbolfrog's delightful Homepage:
These are a few more GREAT sites that I've also made
|~*Test of Life and Love*~||~*Test of Numbers*~|
|~*The Elephant Dance*~||~*Food Equations*~|
|~*Friendship Reminder*~||~*Synaptic Wiring*~|
|~*How To Annoy People*~||~*How Now Brown Cow*~|
|~*Good Luck Totem*~|
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